Buttering Up a Teacher for Dummies

As I was graciously washing the dishes, minding my own business, somebody was calling my mobile phone (sosyal, mobile..).

Other line: Hello, si Ms. Mendoza po ito?

Moi: Opo

Other line: Mommy po ito ni (name of student who got 74% as final grade, besides all my attempts to pull it up), ipapakiusap ko lang sana...

Then she started telling me I should reconsider her daughter's grade. She's a graduating student and I should understand their position as parents. The mom said they were hoping that their daughter could start helping out in their family expenses once she graduates.

I politely declined, telling her my reasons - that her daughter has failing grades in the exams and always came to class hours late. Whenever she misses out an exam due to her absence, I always give her make-up exams. Plus when I told her to report on a topic, after 2 weeks to prepare, all she did was read a book to the class. How on earth do they expect me to give a passing mark to such a "hardworking" student?

Student's mom: ...naging student ka rin, dapat alam mo ang pakiramdam...(chenelyn chenelyn)

Moi: Opo tama kayo naging student din ako. Pero nung student po ako, ginagawa ko lahat ng pinapagawa ng teachers ko.

Student's mom: Sana man lang inisip mo mga magulang na nagpapaaral, (&^*%#!)

Moi: Mam, iniisip ko rin po kayo pero binigay ko na po kasi lahat ng chances para makapasa, ganun parin po, wala na po akong magagawa, sa school po kayo magreklamo

Student's mom: IKAW ANGKAPAL NG MUKHA MO! SINUSUMPA KITA!

Moi: (wtf??) sige po mam, isumpa nio po ako hangga't gusto nio, sa school po kayo magreklamo, okei, bye!

That was smooth. That was really, really smooth.

Begging rule #1: never put evil spells on the person you're begging to.

Begging rule #2: never insult the person you're begging to.

Begging rule #3: I've encoded the grades, there's nothing that begging can do.

After all the profanities she gave me, all the uneducated behavior she displayed, all I could do was laugh. Because she was really funny. I wish I could have recorded it.